I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Randomize