he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize