Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
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