Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
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He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
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This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
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