Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Randomize