Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize