I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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