I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize