Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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