Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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