Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
