Buhtt sex?
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
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Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
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After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
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