Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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