That's intense
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
