Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
