The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
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