big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
did i just pee glitter
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way