did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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