this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
He? As in you personified your dick?
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
