His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
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I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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