I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
