Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
organizing the empties. That sober.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
