She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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