My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
