But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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