Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
