My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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