I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
