don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
