Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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