I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
It's never too late to be topless.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Randomize
