it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Randomize