Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
