Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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