Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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