I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Randomize
