It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Randomize