My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
This baby is an asshole
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Randomize
