Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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