I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
