so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize