dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize