You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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