The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
