try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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