Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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