I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Randomize
