"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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