We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Randomize