Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize