Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
only you would photoshop your dick
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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