I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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