i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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